🎁 Feedback Is a Gift. So Why Won’t We Give It?
Around the world, I’ve asked audiences these four questions:
“Do you like to receive gifts?”
100% of hands go up.
“Do you like to give gifts?”
Again, 100%.
“Do you like to receive feedback, even when it’s tough?”
Nearly every hand goes up.
“Do you like to GIVE feedback to others, even when it’s tough?”
Suddenly… almost no hands. 😳
I always find that fascinating.
✅We want to give and receive gifts.
✅We want to receive tough feedback – which, when delivered well, is a gift.
But when it comes to giving that gift to someone else? “No, thank you!”
And yet, because we cannot see ourselves as others do, feedback is one of our greatest sources of growth.
So why are we so reluctant to give others something we value receiving ourselves?
The reason I hear most often from leaders: “I don’t want to hurt their feelings.”
That sounds compassionate, right? But is it?
Because when you withhold feedback that someone actually requires in order to grow, whose needs are you actually serving?
I’ll share my perspective on that in my next post.
In the meantime, I’m curious:
❓What makes giving tough feedback difficult for YOU?